Quote of The Day

Thursday, October 16, 2014

Guilt Monster, Paint Party Friday

Guilt is a ugly monster that can alter the quality of your life! There are things I don't want to do, things I feel obligated to, and things I worry about doing. Guilt really is a useless waste of energy. 

When my mother was in Palliative care many many moons ago my life came to a halt so I could visit very long days.

Some of the family was in denial, not (me). I adjusted my  life drastically from living on adrenalin in order to accomplish super  mom woman status to best most supportive daughter ever!
After three months of daily hospital visits, very long hours at a time, the family waited in a room to speak to the doctor. 
Original Boman
Always a strong woman, mom had declined any more physio therapy knowing she was at the end. She no longer wanted to suffer the pain of walking around when she felt like crap.
Mandarin Orange Monday
All but her sister supported her wishes. My aunt somehow figured if she would walk she would recover. 
There was so much guilt in that room. Guilt because we'd not made enough time for mom in the last few years. I worked full time and had a young child. My life was as busy as  moms   had been. 

Carver Original
When I wasn't working I was cooking, cleaning and doing 
everything  to be the super woman she raised me to be. 

 Five years younger my sibling felt even worse. Working as much overtime as he could  while taking care of a home and religiously working out. With  partying and having a little lady fun like many young men do  he had no time for mom either.
In that moment we knew we were living the way we were taught. We had the exact same time for mom as she had always had for us.  Not enough.

 Thankfully both my brother and I have rectified that with our own children. 
It's paid off, and we both have very close intimate relationships with our children and their partners. Relationships we have honed from infancy.
I know that guilt is a energy draining waste of time and useless emotion. It eats up creative space in your mind!  I have yet to find a woman who doesn't feel buried by it! I still fall prey to it myself!  Guilt is a monster we should all release...
 What would you replace your guilt with?
Original Greenadine
What guilt are you needlessly carrying around that you can do nothing about anyway?

Thursday, October 09, 2014

I want her to know! Paint Party Friday

Paint Party Friday
Art Journal Journey
What I want Cupcake to know that I didn't learn 
until later in life is that you can create any lifestyle 
you want and attract those like minded people to you.
Mandarin Orange Monday
In her  late twenties I want her to know that everyone has a
 great gift! I want her to understand  the importance of heeding
 your calling, so you can  understand the true joy of life!
This is my original painting! See all the digital fun I  had below!
I want Cupcake to understand that our gifts won't 
necessarily parallel others.That they can be  simple
 quiet gifts or a loud boisterous callings. No matter what, 
they will be suited to our individual  style. They
 will define  our essence!
Most people feel comfortable the moment they enter 
our whimsical colorful house. It's a beautiful loving place, 
where many people have divulged secrets they could share 
no where else. Even though it can be difficult to carry those 
secrets it's an honour that people
 feel safe here.
It's a place of safety. Of love and understanding. We 
aren't athletes, or fitness junkies. We're not fastidious 
about keeping our home perfect every moment!
 We tend to let things go too long. We have very lazy days. 
However, we cook well, we laugh lots and we talk about
 world issues and care about human beings!
 Even though we can all be very fun in social situations
 we  are all creative introverts. I used to think I was
 eccentric with my love of color.I have adjusted that
 thinking to  following my true nature as an artist,
 or woman who likes to create!
Deep in the Forest
Not everyone can cook well. Goodness knows I'm 
not a conventional artist who can draw everything I see.
 I am a woman who as a little girl awoke every morning
 wanting to color! I am the young girl who spent her
 allowance on a pair of sunglasses that had several
 different colored lenses she could alternate.
I am a young teen who wore patterned nylons that nearly 
drove her mum around the bend! I'm a young adult who 
painted every room in her home a cohesive bold color!
 I'm the  thirty five year old who wore big colorful bows 
made out of scarves in her hair.Now I am a lady in
 black with a colorful patterned cane who finally
 knows who she is!
I used to take my gifts for granted thinking everyone could 
cook, write, or share wisdom or budget like I could! 
Attached to that kind of thought was judgement!
 Thankfully I came to the realization that not everyone
 shares the same gifts! 

 I have an adventurous friend who  introduces you to
 places and things you'd never imagine.I have
 another who remembers ever single date and event in
 sequence, she's like a memory machine with an amazing 
sense of humour! Another friend  can always find
an interesting wise solution to any difficult problem.
 Dreamer that's you!
I have a friend who is a sounding board and no matter 
what you tell her she's judgement free and helpful. I have 
one who is a creative champion and inspires everyone 
in her midst to create something! Cupcakes mother 
in law who has ten children is a baby whisperer 
who can calm the most discontented baby or toddler. 
Life is more exciting and full when we amalgamate
 all our gifts and share with the world those special
 things only we can do!  I have changed perspectives 
with my gifts and others have changed me with theirs!

What are some of your unique gifts  you take for granted?

Happy Thanksgiving to all my Canadian friends!!

I love Sue Kreitzmans story and Art Attitude! 
She's a pretty dynamic! 
An interesting character for sure!
I have ALWAYS,  wanted an Art coat like hers!
More about Sue Here

Thursday, October 02, 2014

Intuition, Paint Party Friday

Halloween Harriet
With a lack of sleep I feel much like a zombie, so my creative streak  has come to a lull! These were done very last minute. Since May I haven't had as many driving obligations and it really has freed up my time. I've enjoyed the freedom. However Beardo had a business trip this week so I have been driving a bit more. 
Marquette Face #29

It's a beautiful time of year so I don't mind, but it cut into my creative energy. I live a creative life and that doesn't always mean waking on demand. So shuttling Beardo to the plane threw me off a bit even though I love doing it for him!! 
I can be a bit of an energy vampire so I rarely speak while my family is packing.    Knowing it can throw a traveler off  and make them forget things. For that reason  I also hate  being disturbed when I pack.
Jullien face #27

 However... this time was different. I didn't speak during the process but I checked to make sure Beardo had a few extra things as a precaution. He was headed to Toronto  where my brother was stranded for nine days during Nine Eleven. 
I was a bit more of a Mother hen than normal. Not a crazy cluck cluck cluck mother hen, maybe more of a nervous Nelly! He's been there a few times before and I've not had a second thought. I assured him if his trip got cancelled, which he was worried it may,  maybe it wasn't meant to be. 
Harriet Face #28
During wartime my dad was in the air force, bumped off a plane by an officer, and the plane crashed. He always felt fortunate it wasn't his time to go.  I'm kind of glad too since I wouldn't be here!

After I dropped Beardo at the airport I decided to slip back into bed. I tossed and turned unable to sleep... eventually I passed out. An hour and half later I got a call. 
Since I was so sleep deprived I  squeezed into my pillow and let it ring without checking who called.  A few minutes later the phone rang again and I knew I had to answer it.

 It was Cupcake.....she started with a positive....the flight was good, he safe but his taxi was just rear ended! She was a basket case not knowing if he was okay.

He was communicating with her when the car was hit. They took him by ambulance to be checked out. They had to remove the seat from the taxi to recover his luggage which was thankfully only a carry on.  He spent the next five hours on a spinal board.Thankfully nothing was broken and he was released and told to take ibprophen since he'd be in pain the next day. We won't know until he arrives home how he is.
I was glad he had all the little extras, extra phone time and money, a bit of food to munch on since he hadn't eaten in since the wee hours. I will sleep better tonight knowing he's back home under our roof. I can only hope he doesn't suffer too much in the coming days!!

I normally give him a big hug before he leaves on a trip. This time we were way too rushed dropping him off so Cupcake hugged him extra long for me!! Now I know why I was so upset that I didn't hug him!

 Have you ever regretted not hugging someone or 
telling them how much you care
 then had something scary happened?
We always say," I love you," thankfully I did and he knew that!

Have you ever had an intuition but didn't quite understand until later?

Thursday, September 25, 2014

Attitude of Gratitude! aint Party Friday

Marcia #20 eeks  the camera flash hit her cheek
Appreciating simple things is such a gift because you enjoy so much more in life!

 I wrote this comment in response to another bloggers post,  but stole it back as the jumping off point for my own post! I'm always  inspired by other bloggers, that's why I find it  so important to visit when I can!

 Today I want to thank all of you who take time out of your precious day to read my often long winded blog posts each Friday!  It's such a joy getting to know all of you! The inspiration I get from your comments and blogs filled with art and love is insurmountable! Words can't express how truly grateful I am for each and everyone of you. 
Blogging is such an intimate place where people can bare their souls through art and words. It's a chance to have others truly understand our inner workings! I have no doubt their are   bloggers with friends who haven't a clue about the writer/artist they are! I think it's such an honour that people visit our blogs! Even when we aren't at our very best!
I have  always felt thankful for the simple daily things. Although I may not always say it aloud, there is a constant internal dialogue of appreciation happening within!  Some may call it a prayer, or just  plain "being grateful!" It helps me appreciate each moment instead of waiting for some huge extreme event to bring me joy. 

Face  #23 Joanne done with watercolor crayons and acrylics
Acknowledging the wonderful little things that happen daily can bring so much joy! Like hearing your  kids joking about giving each other  a slug hug. A hands free  hug while  carrying in groceries, just  to feel close for a second! Now it's a daily ritual filled with laughter! Imagine two adults running around yelling slug hug then banging their chests together...it's priceless, silly and brings me simple joy.
 This is my favorite photo of the summer and I can't completely tell you why! Probably because I know both kids had such a good time at a Jack White concert in the park! Love the hat and clean chucks. When Cupcake was little I cleaned her shoes every night! That was when I was a wacked out super mom...those days are long gone!
 Face # 24 Gel
Beardo and Cupcake not only slug hug,  they high five with hands slapping together in the air several times a day!  I ignored it as more silliness that is them. Then one day they explained that they're celebrating each other!! How wonderful I thought!
Face #25 Sooz
Until I realized they were high fiving flatulence  and other nonsensical things.
 Of course I laughed. Grateful their relationship  is filled with  daily
 bit of silliness and laughter.
Face #19 Mac
 I learned early how to find joy in very simple things. As a young person I loved playing board games, cards and singing around the piano. Spending the day making perogies with my Ukrainian girlfriend was really rewarding. We laughed while we worked making our favorite meal. I enjoyed making old things look new, and I still do.
Face #21 and #22 Mona and Angry Marney
I've passed the joy of simple things onto my daughter. She loves concerts, travel and shopping, but she knows how to find joy in simple things too!! Cupcake was born grateful and thanked me for small things very early. She'd thank me completely out of the blue. She'd stare at me, then  affectionately say "I love you so much mommy!" I was always surprised at such a small person so full of sincere love and gratitude
Face #26 Sabine
That's what made it so easy for me to go on  banana, 
blue raspberry or rootbeer Slurpee hunt all over town. 
Looking for those frozen drinks  so full of icy yumminess, 
giggling at each dead end,  until we found our favorite 
flavour of the month! Not exactly an environmentally
 friendly or healthy thing to do, but so much fun!
Daily little thoughts of thanks pass through my head for my car, 
cozy bed, hot bath,food on the table, art from friends, color, 
a game of scrabble, a cup of coffee, my fun powder room,
 my pink walls, my kids and their antics, a lunch with friends, 
happy memories, a happy internet story, a good blog read, 
paint party fridays and much much  more!
So grateful for this big banana and his hotdog!
  No matter how hard things got I was always grateful for what I had.
 Instead of feeling sorry for myself I would flip on a tv channel 
where they showed others suffering in different lands 
and I knew I had it good! I'd say a prayer for them 
and a prayer of gratitude for me!

"You can't feel joy without  feeling gratitude!" 

Hey why is it called beauty sleep when you wake up looking like a troll?
How about you, are you always searching for joy,
 or do you find it in the everyday things? 
What is the most bazaar thing you feel grateful for?
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