Quote of The Day

Friday, April 04, 2014

Do you waste your love? Paint Party Friday


It`s been a rough week emotionally and creatively. This little face was done two weeks ago as a decoration on a child's gift. My artwork is horrible right now. Bare with me,  I`m afraid it`s all about color this week.
 Have you ever watched a friend or family memeber invest their love in the wrong people? When I was young I had many friendships that were one sided. I probably had a different love language than those I befriended. Repeatedly I have witnessed those I care about truly bruised and used by family members and friends who take advantage of their loving nature! I must say it's very difficult to watch!
I want to scream from the top of my lungs...."INVEST IN THOSE WHO ARE WORTHY OF YOUR LOVE"!!! I want to say,"don't waste your time and  love on those who don't appreciate and respect your kind heart!  Don't let  callous people keep hurting you!
But I don`t, because I know that Love is often the answer. Keeping a loving heart usually works. Unless people are addicted or mentally ill! Then  it becomes a co-dependent relationship of loving them in a toxic way by constantly excusing their bad behavior! Those tend to be the people  who need our love the most yet take such advantage of it!
Boundaries are such a necessity when others hold our love for ransom....expecting us to do things against our nature, to get a fair, loving response. When do we pull back our love? How do we deal with those  one sided extended relationships we're bound to by marriage or blood?
I'm not the woman I used to be.  I can't give what I used to. I  share my wisdom, my heart, but physically I don't have the energy of my past. I'm  not the friend I used to be either. Long hours spent on the phone with fair weather friends hashing out their weekly problems......is gone.  The baking and cooking I did for others.....gone. Quaint dinner parties, almost non existence.  The adventures are very few....because that's all I have to give. I am pretty spent as far as drama goes too.

I tend to stick  with  family now.... and those without judgement.  I have narrowed my circle of friends and I like it that way! I love deeply my dear long time friends and keep them close. For those near and dear I'd open the drama door, because they never abuse it!  Each moment spent with them is precious, each phone call and email treasured!  I spend a lot of creative time alone and I like that too! I spend my love on those who truly appreciate my wisdom,  my time and me!  How about you.....is your love often wasted on the wrong  people? Do you think it's possible to  waste our love on the wrong people? This is a question I ask myself, because I believe  love is always the answer!
 Gorgeous Jodi Ohl prints
I always like to end on a happy note! This week  I received a beautiful Jodi Ohl print that I won!! I love it so much and  can`t wait to frame it!!  It has all the color and whimsy that makes my heart sing!! Thank you so much Jodi, I LOVE your artwork!! You can find Jodi here!


Last but not least the winner of my Quotes to ponder book and tote bag is Annabelle!
Congratulations Annabelle and please send me an email with your  home address so I can pop it in the mail!

34 comments:

Valerie-Jael said...

Another beautiful post, full of colours and wise words. Valerie

zana said...

A very thought provoking post! I too have been where you are and these days treasure hose who don't suck the life blood out of me! I think if you are truly loving you have to learn the hard way - experience creates wisdom. But it is hard sometimes to watch those you love being used. I love the frogs! Take care and hope you have a better week.
Hugs

Tracey Fletcher King said...

You write and express yourself so eloquently... Opposite to my ramblings and yet somehow we still get on so well... You have a hugely generous spirit and I think your art is great no matter what you think of it... As to spending love on the wrong people... We all do it when we are young but wisdom is a fabulous thing...
T xx
Ps look at me commenting via iPad... Technology is a snack now Phants is setting things up for me... Love to you all xx

Netty said...

Another beautifully written post alongside some fab artwork. Happy PPF, Annette x

http://nettysartadventures.blogspot.co.uk/

Marianne said...

Love your post - and all your thoughts. I think I'll have to think a little more about it...
By the way - I LOVE your artwork... Your style is stunning.

Aga Gasiniak said...

Beautiful and very honest post. Thank you for sharing your thoughts. It is great that you value your time, yourself and your family and spread love everywhere. You are very inspiring person with a beautiful heart to follow!
http://agagasiniak.blogspot.co.uk

denthe said...

What do you mean, your artwork is horrible!? It's not. It's colorful and bright and very you! I agree it's hard watching people you love getting treated badly by others. Not much you can do there, except be there for them. I recognize what you say about tending to stick to the people who are worth it. I think the older you get the more you know what you can and cannot accept. I know I have much less trouble now closing the door on someone who I feel is not worthy of my love...

Jez said...

I agree with you that love is never wasted, even if it seems so sometimes. I know we have soldiered on through times when it was difficult to love more than one person, but in the end came right and made the struggle right. Sometimes love cannot be turned on and off, but I agree that as we get older we don't have the emotional or physical strength to spread it as wide as we used to. At least it gets focussed more on those who are close to us.
I am interested in studying your art lately, and in the time since I 'discovered' you I have seen a change and development. Isn't it lovely how this can happen, and for myself I feel that blogging has helped me move forward. As always I love what you do and say. XX

Jessica Sporn said...

you and I had similar things on our minds this week... take care of your beautiful heart and keep painting these gorgeously vibrant meaningful paintings. Happy PPF!

MeOfCourse said...

Fabulous art post and and thought provoking words, as always. Thank you. Happy weekend to you.

Laila said...

No, I no longer waste my time. It's such an important theme you're writing about toay. It's hard to look at, but each person has to come to a conclusion for them self. At least that's what I think. When I put my foot down, I quickly saw who was my friends because of me and who was my friends because of what I did for them.It's a reliefe to have done that.
Happy PFF, and have a lovely weekend.

Faye said...

Sherrie, I have some of the very same thoughts. My circle of friends has narrowed. Time and energy are not the same as when I was young. I love the happy 4th birthday painting. The face is so precious and has such a sweetness to it. Also, I have a young person in my extended family who is dating a person who uses her. My heart aches for what youth she is wasting with this creep. I can't say anything because I am an inlaw part of the family. It hurts to see such happen.

AnnD said...

Good for you for finding a way to create even when you're frustrated with your artwork, which I'm SURE is not "horrible," even though we all go through those moments when it looks that way to us!

One of my favorite parts about growing older is learning that we can discard people we don't "fit" with and those who drain us dry. You deserve a small circle of quality people who love and appreciate you, and it sounds like you've achieved just that!

Linda said...

Your posts are so well written, full of honesty and openness. I believe I too have gotten much like you after many years, but it took some hard lessons to learn you just have to let go of some people for your own good. I've had to get past thinking I could be the person to change them around, make them better. Who did I think I was anyway? Fab paintings -such a bright spot at PPF each week. And congrats to Annabelle-lucky lady!!

Katherine Jeanne Wood said...

You sound like you need lots of love, too. It's not easy to watch this happen to people you love. xo xo xo

gillena cox said...

luv the froggie wisdom and the tote; have a nice Friday

much love...

Annabelle said...


Oh my lord Giggles, I could have written this post!

I once thought I was a pretty good judge of character, I was wrong!
As a human being we all like to be accepted and loved and when we aren't it hurts. I've been down this road a few times and I have finally realized that it's not my handicap but theirs and in retrospect I really haven't lost a thing!What does matter is that I have a family who I love very much and that loves me in return and friends that unconditionally love me for who I am.

As for extended family, when they become an unhappy circumstance, it's altogether another story and can create havoc with debilitating effects.Your days aren't fulfilled to the max in the ways you would like, your physical and mental state get a beating and your concentration is lacking in the areas you wish it were.Totally drained there isn't a lot left to run on and thus misery becomes your unwilling mate.

Best advise I have received from my doctor is this......
“It is paramount to make your boundaries” to prevail the unhappy circumstance.
One needs to make time for themselves, happy time, a time for solace and reflection and therefore create a clear and sound mind with that positive follows and good comes of it. I don't waste love anymore : )

Loved your post Giggles and I'm so excited to be the lucky winner of your poetry and gorgeous tote, can't believe I won! What a very lovely surprise. Can't wait to get it!

Thanks a bunch!

Annabelle : )

p.s. will send you my addy soon, thanks again

Ilona Heimböckel said...

Congratulations to Annabelle!

:-) I guess I was a bit cheeky in my last comment.
Tonight I needed some time off my books - and! I am visiting a friend who's daughter has a new boyfriend, who reminded me of your son in law (he has a big beard) so I told my friend about you.
That's all from me today no confessions or anything, I'm lacking energy for that kind of writing.
Sending you a big hug and am looking forward to more frequent visits in a few months time!
Ilona

Abigail Davidson said...

Lovely creations and great color combinations!

Lynn Richards said...

Great post.
I don't think love is ever wasted per say, but the learning of boundaries is essential. I do think love can be given and given and taken til you are dry and never appreciated. hmmmm..then is it wasted? Great question!

Lynn Richards said...

Great post.
I don't think love is ever wasted per say, but the learning of boundaries is essential. I do think love can be given and given and taken til you are dry and never appreciated. hmmmm..then is it wasted? Great question!

Tam Hess said...

Alright MISS! You did it again, are we twins in the brain? Everything yes, me too, I did that, boundaries yup, just a few friends check! haha LOVE your words. Your art is fun to see. I just adore the colors you use. You know...you could do an ecourse on wisdom and relationships. You would be good at that!

Happy Paint Party Friday!
http://www.tamsartinflight.com
http://cardmakingartists.com

Lynn Cohen said...

I spin down the list on PPF and try to pay tribute to as many artists as I have time to do so for. I come to your blog and I say okay, slow down, this is one you must read every word of, as there will be a message for you and you will WANT to respond. And so I do.
Well, my BEST friend Died. And her drama I miss/LOL I do/ I miss HER, and her family had lots of DRAMA. She listened to mine and I to hers and we were there holding each other up for so many years.
Now I am down to a very few friends I see on a few occasions a year. No more DRAMA LISTENING really; No one to be overly helpful to; (I do that at work I guess so don't need to do it outside of work); My husband is my BEST friend; I love my kids, grandkids, daughter in law; But none of them put their stuff out there for me to inspect or offer solace for ... DIL tired once, but I had to say I can't be the umpire between her and my son.
we are NOT a drama laden family. Thank goodness. I had more dramatic friends in the past. One I actually dumped to get rid of IT. So just saying I understand.
And your art is always great in my opinion. Glad YOU are my friend.

Christine said...

cute art! Congrats to Annabelle!

Arnoldo L. Romero, MLA said...

The older I get, the less I worry about appearances. I am loving and caring, but I won't try to make people like me through pretentiousness. Blessings!

Paper rainbow said...

Oh how I can connect to your wise words. It sounds like you have the balance just right now. I hope your present difficulties are calmed soon there is nothing worse than watching those we care most for making the wrong choices.

Nicole Beadwright Campanella said...

Oh sweet lady your art is NEVER horrible. You create from your heart and so that is always a beautiful thing. Sending you love and joyful energy
Nicole/Beadwright

pauline said...

omg girl, your posts (and art, and words) always make me laugh (and sometimes teary...) i love your honesty and cannot imagine not being able to visit here and see all these vibrant colors and read all your wonderful stories. i'm happy you are YOU and happy we found each other via blog land. (ps: cupcake & beardo are adorable) xx

Ayala Art said...

so true... and such a good decision to take.
The art is fantastic as always ♥

Jess said...

I agree with what you say about wasting precious energy on friends who drain it away. I used to be the one who sorted out their problems, helped them to see the bright side and bolstered their confidence. I no longer have the energy to do this any more and like you, keep close to me friends that are my equal, who are compassionate about others and not wrapped up in their own dramas. It's good to hear I'm not alone. :)
Lovely artwork by the way!
Jess xx

Debbie said...

Life is too short to waste it with people that make us unhappy. Some people will never be happy, no matter what we try to do! I love your art this week, and your very thoughtful post.

Irene Rafael said...

Dear Giggles, Your posts are always wise and heart felt and I love to come visit. Thank you for the continued inspiration.
~~ irene

lorik said...

I can identify with a lot of what you have written. We learn, don't we..I guess we have to. as you say...our energy runs out. But your artwork is certainly full of energy! It's great!

sheila 77 said...

I think we can all identify with what you say here so eloquently. Unfortunately it is these "toxic" people who often need love most.
By the way if this is horrible art, then I want to see more of it, I love the first painting, it's adorable.

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