Ten years ago Today
An ugly intimidation, a scary situation
He came at me wielding a hose
Eyes of fire a stranger now
He was a man I didn’t know
Anger and oblivion to what may transpire
He forced his way at me, screaming words of ire
I begged and pleaded for reprieve, which he refused to heed
He continued to threaten and berate, refusing to concede
He held my head to the nozzle, its pressure full and strong
I thought that he may drown me, and the terror carried on
I tried to shift his legs, so I could escape and run
He avoided my fateful tries, I was sure that he had won
My brain was rushing in survival mode, calculating what to do
Not a violent thought within, I was afraid of what might ensue
The harder that I struggled, the meaner the man became
With no choice I kneed him, I was sure he’d become insane
He dropped the hose and pummeled me, then kicked me in the gut
A primal scream evoked, as I fell to the aggregate
Anguish that I’d never known, as a switch clicked in my head
Finale to those hopes and dreams, with the marriage finally dead
He turned and walked into the house and made a can of soup
Left me soaked from head to toe, unable to regroup
Neighbors rallied to rescue me, in my humiliated state
Disoriented from the blows, fumbling open the locked gate
Police came in droves and took charge of my life
No longer his victim, I refused to be his wife
More embittered than before, he harassed us for years to come
Manic in his attitude, more court dates to succumb
Ten years past, ten years gone, it seems like yesterday
The way my life's evolved since then, I’d have no other way
Solace fills my heart now, and not a day did I regret
Never missed him for a second, but I’ll not forget!
An ugly intimidation, a scary situation
He came at me wielding a hose
Eyes of fire a stranger now
He was a man I didn’t know
Anger and oblivion to what may transpire
He forced his way at me, screaming words of ire
I begged and pleaded for reprieve, which he refused to heed
He continued to threaten and berate, refusing to concede
He held my head to the nozzle, its pressure full and strong
I thought that he may drown me, and the terror carried on
I tried to shift his legs, so I could escape and run
He avoided my fateful tries, I was sure that he had won
My brain was rushing in survival mode, calculating what to do
Not a violent thought within, I was afraid of what might ensue
The harder that I struggled, the meaner the man became
With no choice I kneed him, I was sure he’d become insane
He dropped the hose and pummeled me, then kicked me in the gut
A primal scream evoked, as I fell to the aggregate
Anguish that I’d never known, as a switch clicked in my head
Finale to those hopes and dreams, with the marriage finally dead
He turned and walked into the house and made a can of soup
Left me soaked from head to toe, unable to regroup
Neighbors rallied to rescue me, in my humiliated state
Disoriented from the blows, fumbling open the locked gate
Police came in droves and took charge of my life
No longer his victim, I refused to be his wife
More embittered than before, he harassed us for years to come
Manic in his attitude, more court dates to succumb
Ten years past, ten years gone, it seems like yesterday
The way my life's evolved since then, I’d have no other way
Solace fills my heart now, and not a day did I regret
Never missed him for a second, but I’ll not forget!
Sherrie Leesa
This was only the start of an extremely difficult year of court battles and harassment. Fortunately my child did not witness this incident; however she has witnessed many other types of abuse. She was the biggest victim in the whole situation. Over the years he finally settled down. I think it’s possible he was forced to get help. Although I have nothing to do with the man, she still falls prey to his dramas and narcissistic attitude. It took my child time to build a bridge into a partially functioning relationship, which I assure you didn’t come without sacrifice on her part. Now as an adult, she is less forgiving of his constant unbending attitude and insensitive ways. My biggest disappointment in life is that he wasn’t the father I thought him to be. There are so many good things about the man which I am blessed to see in my child. Unfortunately a lot of the ugliness seems to trump it all, as he continues to hurt her. My child is adamant about becoming successful and strives to overcome the adversity! It’s just sad that her dad is such a huge void in her life, not by our choice either.
7 comments:
Wow!
Is that how you lived?
I had no idea.
You are such a strong, loving and vibrant woman from what I know of you so far.
I am glad to know you and I am glad that you took control.
Nicci
Awe……. thanks for the sweet words Nicci. It was mostly verbal abuse, sprinkled with a few incidences of man handling, then the ugly finale. Gabriel’s husband was my lawyer, phenomenal man! Wonderful to know you too Nicci, you have such a warm heart!
Peace and giggles Sherrie
Oh, sweetie what a nightmare you endured! Thank you for sharing your struggle, which surely will inspire other women dealing with spousal abuse. I'm so glad you had the power to leave and rebuild your life. Excellent poem and art about a painful subject.
I appreciate the wonderful compliments. Thankfully the ugliness is well behind me.
Dredging it up can be difficult; but I’m grateful for a clearer perspective, now that I'm detached from it! If talking about it helps one woman, then it’s a godsend in my eyes!
I had one of those and I was ever so grateful when he was gone. Not doing the kids any good at all when they are subjected to such hated and anger.
Have a terrific day. :)
What a nightmare! Thankfully you survived and thrived and left him in the dust. I'm sure it's very hard for Pepper to know what kind of man her father is. Thankfully she found a good man to share her life with.
Sweetheart, I have been there, done that, so to speak. The ugliness does not go away. They may settle down, but it's always inside. And the memories may fade, but they too linger. It's the children who suffer, even long afterward, even after the abuser is long gone. You are brave.
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