Click image to enlargeI kind of get a chuckle at everyone trying to figure out why people are fat. Now they say they have narrowed it down to the addiction hormone and that’s why we’re fat.My thin daughter heard that and piped up in her blatant tone, "you're not addicted to food!!" Thank you Pepper but here are my Thirteen reasons why I’m fat (Gross or large) and don’t lose weight!
To stave off all the young lovers banging down my door! (Oh yeah that was in my dream!)
I never move when I do Art! ( take that as you will)
I have cement blocks attached to my feet….and can’t leave my computer ( that's my story and I'm stickin to it!)
If I lose weigh my clothes will fall off ( and that WOULD be SCARY!)
I like pretending I am the cookie monster! ( Been doin it for YEARRRSSS, obviously!)
Scrabble is my real lover, and he says he likes me for my mind! ( I've also had affairs with reading, blogging, and I'm cheating with ART)
I refuse to eat anything that doesn’t taste marvelous! ( I gag on fat free food and choke on anything dry)
I like being the biggest one in my group
I like the occasional pop with my spirits! ( or spirits with my pop)
My best friends are Mayo, Dressing made with mayo, and Sour Cream! ( and all the high calorie cousins)
I can’t afford new bras ( that would be increments in the later half of the alphabet)
Instant gratification is my intimate partner, and he force feeds me!
Okay okay the real truth is..... I am training for a hotdog contest! ( my daughter was concerned you might believe this one!)
Click image to enlarge
10 comments:
I love your honesty, especially about the men. At least brush those cookie crumbs from your hair. lol
Brains, good taste, beauty and cleavage? I could go way over thirteen on your assets girl!
LOVE
T
Blogger ate my comment!
I love your honesty, especially about men! At least brush the cookie crumbs from your hair. lol
Brains, beauty, cleavage and good taste? Sounds good to me. ;) I could keep going...
XXOO
Sherrie - you are an awesome lady - I love your outlook and your sense of humor and from what I've seen, you are gorgeous, inside and out. One size does not fit all -beautiful women come in all sizes. Thank heavens, or we'd never find anything to wear, it's hard enough to shop and find something in the size needed already, lol~XOXO
Giggley girl, I never thought I would ever scold you, but that time is now. YOU my sweet friend are in NO way GROSS ( if the hotdog thing was true, I may not feel this way) BUT... Being a lover of food and a bit large is Not gross.( If you are taking that sour cream and mayo to bed, welll... that's a different thing.) I LOVE LOVE your drawing and I love you for creating your amusing list, but I hope you are just being humorous with that title. xoxo
( Is this the actually theme for this TT stuff?)
I must agree with Tinker on this. You are awesome, and talented, and beautiful inside and out. Think how boring life would be if we all looked the same! Variety is the spice of life! Or was that mayo??
"It takes a lot of work and money to look this trashy"- Dolly Parton. I like to say, "It took a lot of money for me to look this plump." - which it did. Thanks Hubby all that eating out I have no regrets. It's true- your clothes do fall off if you loose weight and then you are naked :)
smiles. I like your blog and your art!
"Cookies"!!!!!
(Cookie Monster voice)
yum!
Ah-ha, I've never thought I was cheating by doing art on a conscious level, but you know, I think I might in the subconscious. Yikes, that is scary! This was so much fun!
Oohhh, I think I may steal the cookie monster comment. Thanks for bringing a smile today.
You are one absolutely fabulous woman who knows what she likes!! There's nothing better than that.
Hugs & love, xx, JP/deb
p.s. now blogging at www.janepoet.blogspot.com
Post a Comment