Friday morning I scooted right, off a side street, into traffic. Behind me a young, refined looking Asian woman flipped me the bird. Continued to do so for several blocks. Afraid I’d not seen her she popped her red car into the next lane. Unrelenting, now parallel to my driver side, I caught her middle finger flailing. Pointing at me. Disrupting my peripheral vision. With more determination than before! I feared she might clip the car ahead of her! She wouldn't be ignored, she needed some kind of reaction or verification that I'd seen her. I felt a fire in me. For a second I reverted back to my twenty year old self. With my head forward, eyes on the road, I quickly flashed my finger back at her. She continued to dance her middle finger vehemently with ire, one upping me, making sure I saw her! Then she stepped on the gas and sped ahead out of sight.
Oh, I am not one bit proud of my reaction. Nowadays I’m more likely to give someone the two finger peace sign, a positive thumbs up, or thank-you wave acknowledging a nice deed. I shrunk to her level. I’m not proud. It’s no longer the seventies. It’s risky business responding or initiating disdain in this manner. However I felt a bit bullied by this young woman! I don’t take chances with my new car. I’m pretty defensive and like to think I'm a courteous driver. I had safely merged into the lane. There was lots of room! My daughter affirmed I’d done nothing wrong. Believe me she is the first to point out any of my mistakes!! Not too long after we got our flowers at the produce stand we heard a siren barreling down the same street. I wondered if the angry young woman caused an accident somewhere up the road!
The next day, I drove to Costco with my daughter. Not a parking spot to be found on the busy Saturday. I wasn’t feeling my best. I didn’t have the energy to walk from the parameter of several acre parking lot, plus do a Costco Shop! So I stopped at the door, suggesting daughter start the shopping while I searched for a reasonable parking spot. I saw a car approaching behind me, so I asked daughter to get out quickly. Not wanting to hold anyone up! Daughter jumped out of the car, opened the back door to get the reusable bags. In my rear view mirror I could see the woman in an SUV behind me swearing banging her fist on the steering wheel and waving for us to hurry! Daughter saw her too. We weren’t dawdling, but daughter was annoyed that she was so impatient. Instead of waiting the woman lurched her SUV around my car yelling obscenities at me as she passed. I ignored it this time! Both daughter and I were glad there was no child crossing in front of my car when Mrs. Grumpy pants, so consumed in anger zoomed by! What is wrong with people??? Where have manners gone? It was literally seconds we were stopped.
Scares me how hostile and belligerent people can be behind the wheel. Is it cell phone withdrawal? Clearly there are people driving around mentally ill, exhausted, angry, and drug addicted, some even have weapons. None of which we can control. One should never let the fire of their youth grab hold of reason like I did with the first woman. Wished I’d flashed her a peace sign instead…. I sincerely doubt it would have helped though!
10 comments:
Isn't the 'middle finger salute' historically a 'victory' gesture..nothing thwarts aggression more than a smile or a friendly wave..well done you on taming your middle finger (I have to say mine is always primed and ready for use)..Jae
What a cautionary tale for our day and age. Sadly. it happens. Fortunately, I think (I believe) most people behave more like you did the second time around.
Road rage is scary, 'though, because it's acting on impulse and it's not thought through. I hope other people read this post and take a more agreeable outlook from it.
I really detest the kind of treatment you were subjected to, and I do not bother with trying to find a reason for it - there is no reason. It is a dangerous manifestion of the way an increasing number of people live their miserable lives: angry, aggressive, uncaring, mean, selfish and downright ignorant of civilised manners.
A very sad observation on the way things are right now.
It's the way things are these days. I just use reverse psychology on them and just smile or ignore. I don't want to take chances on someone pulling out a gun and firing away. I've got lots of paintings to do before I leave this wonderful earth. Have a great week and don't take chances. :)
What a lot of ugly people we have become all to protect "our" space or perceived right to it. Great post that must echo our thoughts exactly.
Once I was at a gas station with my kids and a kid in the next car flipped them off. when they told me I told them to flip back with their pointer finger with a mean face. They asked what does that mean? I said nothing but it will drive them crazy wondering. lol
No, it would not have helped. That girl does not know what peace is. Obviously she has none within. Luckily, you do! xo
love the images on your web site; are those tiles you have made? I totally recognize myself in your post, both the befuddlement and the blazing reaction! then the disappointment in myself. It's hard to be out in public anymore; lots of ugly vibes going on. Breathe, people!
I too have had several occurrences similar to yours. And likewise felt I had not been deserving of the treatment. When other drivers do anything , purposefully or otherwise, I let it go. But sometimes you get so annoyed back, thing is, we have a choice and well, if they have no self control they can just zoom on by and out of our lives.It is scary though isn't it, there are some weirdos out there.
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