Illustration Friday "Twisted"

click picture to enlarge Illustration Friday
"Twisted"

My life has been riddled with statements totally misconstrued. Controversial conversations seem to suffer the most scrutiny, often to my detriment. Even the most articulate types are misinterpreted. It’s a shame that words can be so twisted.

I carried a lot of anger in my twenties, where my thirties were more pensive as I savored the search. My forties were a spiritual overhaul, reflective and peaceful. Now in my fifties I feel more perceptive. I’ve surrounded myself with kind, loving well meaning people. I choose to believe they all express themselves from a place of good intention. When there is a question of their intention, I immediately dissuade the thought, giving them the benefit of the doubt. Knowing they would never purposely hurt me. It’s inevitable that I feel wounded at times, but mostly because I am misunderstood, or dealing with my own issues that need assessment. That’s when I implement change and growth.

Of course we all have dealings with Mr. and Mrs. Grumpy pants. Hopefully they aren’t our friends. Some people are intentionally mean spirited. I effortlessly recognize those with an angry demeanor hiding behind their contemptible humor. Regrettably that was my only mode of protection in the past! For the most part I like to think those select people in my life, all have incredibly good intentions!
Poetry Thursday

Twisted Words
Sometimes words get twisted
Contorted and confused
Misconstrued in translation
Edited and abused

Sometimes words conveyed
Are too obscure to surmise
So the callous recipient
Crafts a futile scrutinize

Sometimes intention of honor
Gets twisted in a maze
Leaving the receiver to choose
How to navigate the haze

Rejecting good intention
With gauche frivolity
Lessons vanish with little care
Suspending union quality

It’s a choice to examine words
Controversially conveyed
As words of mighty purpose
Or as words that shed dismay

Surrounded with devotion
Accepting only good intention
When misgiving knocks
Deny the intervention

Words twisted and disabled
Need a positive position
Maintain your good intention gauge
With a joyful disposition

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A bug in the ear!

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I drew this little picture; as usual I didn’t quite know where it was going. All of a sudden there is was, a bug in the ear! A cliché my mom often used, which I have continued to use in my life! I find it’s a subtle way to communicate when children become Mother deaf!

When Pepper was a teen I sometimes had to put a bug in her ear to get things across. I think women are notorious for that. Dropping delicate hints when they require a task to be done! Or when they spy something desirable that’s a little extravagant! Have you put the bug in someone’s ear lately? It works for me, and it always gives the person on the receiving end an out!


Voice of My Mother

He heard her voice, but it didn’t compute
More motherly blather, for him to dispute
So she found subtle ways, to leave a hint
She timed it perfect, then ignited the flint
Fired up, she whispered words of wise
A day or two later, she could see in his eyes
He got the message, it was put into play
Mother smiled in contentment, as she got her way
She did the same to dad, with her womanly wiles
with that our bathroom, got new purple tiles
A new floor was laid, after his night on the town
He appeased her when she wore, that day after frown

She just had a way, the five foot tall Sue
With the bug in his ear, he knew what to do
Nothing exorbitant, she played on his shame
She used subtle suggestion, to keep the man tame
He had a penchant for shuffle board, and a beer
For curling and golf, to the pub he would veer
A domestic goddess, she ran her own shop
The woman rarely sat down, she just didn’t stop
Years later, well after she'd been gone
I still remember the bug in the ear, she used all along
Her words of wisdom to make us abide
Words as a mother, I have since tried!
The beat travels on, one generation to another
The Voice of a woman, the voice of the mother!

Focusing on your Dreams

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Are you stepping on your own dreams? Are you letting someone steal your dreams? Are you so distracted by small things in life, that you can’t see the dreams right in front of you? Ask yourself….what you can do today to bring yourself closer to fulfilling your dreams?

Here is another Scott Stratton motivational clip. Some good points along the same lines as the secret! Check out it out! What are you focusing on lately? Are you letting any negativity get in the way of meeting your goals? Choose happiness and focus on your dreams! I know I will be!

Sunday Scribblings " Secrets"

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“I have a secret" is the prompt for Sunday Scribblings People tend to share secrets instantaneously with me. I have no idea why. Sometimes it’s a real burden holding them. Other times I have refused to hear them. I’ve held secrets to keep kids safe at school and home. Some secrets have jeopardized relations; with friends and family. There are those who are star struck and have an insatiable need to know secrets. I am not one of those people! I am interested in others, but I simply do not need to know someone’s business. I’ve had to carry secrets to protect children. A few secrets landed in my lap and were imperative to my safety. Lately I have been sitting on one about a young woman who is walking down a destructive path. I care about her because the same person that negatively affected my life has affected hers too! All I can do is pray she'll be safe!

Secrets

Secret codes for email
Bank cards and alarms
Secrets about money
About sex, and fire arms
Secrets about war, abuse
Sometimes jealous thought
Secret loves hidden away
As well as things we’ve bought
Secrets about habits,
Weight, Health and pain
Secret addictions
And things we should refrain
Some secrets held in confidence
Some we must resist
Some we’re forced to keep,
When the adamant persist
Secrets shadow daytime
Creep around at night
Those secrets that keep us safe
Should stay locked up tight!

Poetry Thursday and Illustration Friday Camouflage

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Illustration Friday

Poetry Thursday

Camouflage

Don’t we all camouflage?
In one way or another,
With makeup or a hairdo
Hiding flaws from each other
Some hide a lifestyle
Ashamed to show true self
Dressing up like Santa
Where the wife may play the elf
Some men dye their hair and beard
Wear clothes all the rage
Able to fool the crowd
About their actual age
Some wear expensive attire
Drive cars beyond their means
Presenting a wealthy façade
When they’re actually lacking greens
Some have pain they never show
So they smile and make a joke
If they were forced to share
The tears would make them choke
Some have addictions
To camouflage the hole
Inhabitations they can’t reveal
Locked up in their soul
Don’t we all camouflage?
Things we’d like to say
Things we may be thinking
Things in the fray?

Orb looking for a dance!

Note the orb following Pepper
Click to enlarge pictures.

Life is finally slowing down enough to make some routine posts. I do have errands today so I started my day pretty early, desperate to catch up on emails. Last night I sat in on Pepper and Bryans last dance class stealing a few picture to her chagrin. I was only there because they needed a ride.

It was fun watching some very awkward couples try to find some semblance of grace. Unfortunately there was always one partner not quite up to snuff. I did enjoy watching rubber tire shoe guy. Well that’s what his shoes looked like with his beige flood pants. He was your typical rich nerd, with a really cute partner. Eventually he got the steps down, but he was so rigid, his dancing was completely clinical, where as Bryan was feeling the music.

Years ago I took dancing lessons with my ex, at the beginning I was chastised for leading, by the end of the lessons the instructor blatantly commented, “No wonder you lead!” I guess that’s what you get for insisting on taking dance lessons with a person who claps on the off beat.

I was fortunate to have been raised in a a home where I stood on my dads feets as he glided along the floor.Then in time he taught me to both waltz and jive. Lucky me!

We had fish and chips at the beach before the class, always a nice treat in the summer. Then back to the beach after class for a gelato. They had my favorite…. Pineapple!

I’ve included this fun very short Scott Stratton video on the value of a mother. Enjoy this clip; it’s rare that we are acknowledged for our great work!

To my friends whom I owe emails and blog visits, bear with me, I’m getting to it! Love you all, I’ll be visiting blogs soon I hope! Have a creative day!

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Illustration Friday " Rejection"

What do you mean I’m too much of an oddball?

Sunday Scribblings" Eccentric Goddess"

Sunday Scribblings "Eccentric"

Eccentric Goddess

I’ve never walked the normal path
Not even as a child
Walked myself to church at eight
To see what they’d compiled

Twelve I wandered right next door
Played an old Scottish woman crib
Labeled as a sassy child
Known to be quite glib

At thirteen I started wearing hats
Of every eccentric measure
When I was all of thirty-two
My mother voiced her displeasure

My laugh was loud, my makeup too
Wearing colors bright and sassy
I’d wear vibrant bows upon my crown
Distinct earrings, rather brassy

Bold and brazen with so much pride
People knew me everywhere
Lady with the silver corvette
And the massive curly hair

Ten years later I retired my vette
Bought a Jeep to take its place
Pink fuzzy covers for the seats
I’d conformed to a mother pace

The seventies I painted lively shades
Before it was the fashion
In the eighties I styled my house again
To exude my color passion

The nineties my house was done in pink
Accented with black and green
Now I have many hues of purple
With vivid colors in between

I must have color everywhere
Never seem to have enough
I don’t wear beige or have it present
I enjoy exuberant stuff



I like things to match implicitly
Or my eye feels revulsion
I often feel like the odd one out
With my scrabble compulsion

I had my nose pierced at forty
To commemorate the day
No one thought I’d follow through
But I’m always full of play

I like the mystical inflections
And the energy from beyond
That unique flavor that I enjoy
Is where my happiness is spawned

Some may call me eccentric,
Bohemian, hippy chick
I see myself as a goddess
Some may think that I’m a drip

I’ve never worried what others say
I parented like I think ought
I listened, disciplined and guided
All with lots of thought

Unconventional in my habits
Served popsicles in the bath
Ice cream in the hot tub
Played card to help with math

Let her dye her hair real young
while many parents balked
Didn’t sweat the small things
Didn’t care if I was mocked

I march to a different accordion
I’m a rare one, but that’s just fine
I know who and what I love
And I’m happy with gods design!

Beyond the Moon

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Bryan watching Ethan naps in Peppers arms.


The excruciating headache and nausea I endured Thursday night before bed was a tell tale sign of my difficulty with how I may react to Fridays service for Jayna. Thankfully most of it dissipated during sleep. Not long after we arrived at the MemoriaI we were handed a pretty flyer with my poem on it. What an honor that it was used as part of a very emotional service. There was not a dry eye in the rose garden at Queens Park, where many stood during the outdoor service. If I passed away tomorrow there wouldn't be the large adulation that this precious angel had in her nine and a half months on this earth. A spectacular turn out to support this very special couple as they put their angel to rest on what would have been her 10th month birthday.

Pepper found a little gold heart locket and had it engraved with “love remembers” then presented to Selina. It was a poignant moment. Selina babysat Pepper when she was just Jayna’s age. For years since we’ve been card playing buddies. Here we are twenty-one years later witnessing her unjustified tragedy.

The most emotional moment was watching the distraught mom as she entered the service with husband Andrew trailing behind pushing their lone child in a double stroller. Even Bryan admitted that empty stroller was one of the toughest moments. There were however a few bright spots in the day, observing how happy Ethan was before his seizure medication was administered, which caused him to doze. Meeting Selinas new nephew born on my birthday. Knowing how many friends they have to carry them through this difficult time. My prayers are with this lovely family who have lost so much.

Still Celebrating!

Someone put a birthday bow on top of my regular pink bow! Yes and at one Christmas party I won battery operated blinking lights that I wore the whole night! I think I was choosen purposely to be the eccentric bell of the ball! Celebrating our 35th birthday one week apart in 1991. Always laughing that was me! Today celebrating our 51st birthday sixteen years later and a week past the date! With less makeup to be sure!

You are remembered for the rules you break! Quote Douglas Macarthur.

Todays random quote seemed fitting to describe my on going relationship with life long friend Carolyn.

We have broken many rules over the years. Ritually our escapades are revisited as we dually celebrate our Gemini birthdays one week apart. We're the same age, but the last fifteen years our lives have taken completely different directions. When we manage to clear the slate it’s as though time has waited for our semblance. The feeling of love comes to a roaring boil as we muse over our years of indivisibility, the days before computers, when we’d stay on the phone or in a restaurant until the sun appeared in the wee hours. It wasn’t uncommon for us to naively wear the exact same color clothing, or shoes on the same evening, then giggle in utter disbelief at our twin like choices. It was the best of times and the worst of times to be cliché. Both divorced, she remarried to the best guy in the world. I often talk about him as he’s rescued my car and me more times than not!

In our youth we both shared a love, of dark rum, the color fuchsia, words games, Dr. Mario, world issues, loads of giggles, cards, the beach, and animals. When I was young I lived a very comfortable lifestyle, while she struggled; now she is the one better off! Funny how the pendulum swings! Carolyn is so deserving of grand life style, she’s earned it, my wishes for her finally came true! For years her life was extremely hard and thankless, now she has a daughter that’s just graduated university, I couldn’t be more thrilled.

The days of staying up drinking Spanish coffees, wearing flashing Christmas lights, and throwing piles of rolls of toilet paper out into the dance floor are long gone. Those wild nights dancing and drinking, singing karaoke are all part of our crazy past. Many times our exes were around, many times they weren’t. In retrospect I think we may have been acting out during those intolerable marriages we sustained for way too long. I know I haven’t had a desire to do anything as loony since my divorce eleven years ago!

Today we chatted about kids, tolerance, mainly that ours has waned over the years. We caught up on the yearly goings on, our families and future plans. What a joyful visit it was, and a happy birthday to us! We’re having dinner next week too!

Quacker, chatter and a story!

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Bryan and I spent a short time putting the words to music for Jayna’s song. I was singing along and had a very difficult time getting through it. Breaking down I realized it’s much better if he just does it alone. He’s now recording it as I type through the tears. Hopefully we can present it to our friends in the next day or two. It’s really amazing how fast things come together when they’re meant to be. I’m going to find a way to eventually put it on my blog! I may have to video tape Bryan and then put it on youtube to make it happen.

Sometimes I have a bazzar process. I start out with a few lines, and end up with some crazy art. Funny thing is I made the Quacker a few days ago, today Pepper and Bryan discovered the ducks in the pond behind my place had babies. They squealed with glee when they saw how adorable they are. Those are the perks of taking the bus. Bryan ran back to grab the camera, but the photos are too blurry to post. We’ll get more soon.

I was thinking what a quacker I can be, a while back my brother complimented me. Apparently he tells all his cronies, that his sister is not a “yes person”, explaining that when searching for a solution to certain issues he comes to me knowing I won't just tell him what he wants to hear, but more less my honest perspective. I guess he likes that, who knew. Truthfully being forthright has caused me a lot of heartache in my life. The positive side ,”don’t ask if you don’t want to know”, I can be crassly blunt. Although I like to think I’m becoming more diplomatic in my old age.

Today I took a garage full of bottles to be recycled. I couldn’t even see the back window of my jeep. We usually keep our bottles in the cases pretty neat, but Pepper insisted on her staff recycling at work, continually bringing garbage bags full of them home. I sorted them at the depot, alone I might add, twenty seven dollars worth of stickiness. A middle aged depot worker glommed on to me, she was chattering away while I piled bottles in crates.Between my bad ear, the clanking bottles and rustling of the plastic she was barely audiable. For the most part she wanted to tell me how she got even with her cheating husband. There is probably a poem somewhere in this story, maybe even a country song!

One day she lured her man to a motel room, set up piles of candles around the room, and then poured him a hot bubble bath and told him to relax. While he was settled she told him she needed to get something out of the van assuring him she'd return quickly. Instead she placed a pair of old fancy underwear tucked between the mattresses, so it was hanging out. Then scooped up all his clothes, his wallet, phone, coat, underwear the whole gamut. Left him alone in the tub, drove to where the other woman worked and dropped his clothes off with her. Somehow he managed to call his buddies at work and asked them to bring him a pair of overalls. When the guys arrived they saw the underwear hanging out of the bed, assumed he got lucky with some random chick who duped him by stealing his wallet and clothes. Who would believe his wife did it? Imagine, the stories you hear at the bottle depot.

World Ocean Day

Taking our own picture while standing in the ocean at Crescent Beach!
Still in the water, wind blown hair!
A Block up from Crescent Beach standing in front of glorious home!
Laura in the water on World Ocean Day

Yesterday June, 8th 2007 was World Ocean Day! Laura, Chris and I decided to visit both local beaches, White Rock where we had coffee in the morning, then Crescent a few hours later. We dipped our toes in the Ocean and walked all along the beach…it was almost surreal.

The amazing thing about an untouched beach is the timeless feel about it, for a moment I felt like it was the nineteen sixties again. We put daisies in our hair, Laura and I both instantly thought of the song, “San Francisco” and the line “If you’re going to San Francisco be sure to wear flowers in your hair! Since we all have a passion to be near the ocean we decided to make visiting the ocean on World Ocean day our new tradition.

The day ended with a little over dose of vitamin D which I’m sure will turn into a lovely tan. None of us expected the day to unfold the spectacular way it did. Sometimes it pays to just live in the moment.

An angel missed

I hope you can all excuse the negligence to my blog, and blog visits.
My very dear friends of twenty years, baby passed away Sunday June third. I am paralyzed by shock. These incredible parents, are such  kind, tender, loving, intelligent, warm humorous couple. They have a disabled three year old son , yet to be diagnosed with a genetic defect. So they took precautions with their second child. She was very mildly affected and at nine months far surpassed their sons development. More alert, and responsive to her parents, she was functioning at a better pace.

This amazing family with so many loving relatives is absolutely distraught. The baby was staying with grandma, a phenomenal woman, with an abundance of love. The grandmother has sincerely always lived right. Charitable, generous of her love, time and wisdom, she is truly a great soul! Her pain goes beyond words, because she is an exceptionally maternal mother and grandma. My heart is so sad for this wonderful family, who celebrate everything together. The week previous, a new baby was born on my birthday to Selinas sister. This family has met with so much adversity. We are all sadly left wondering why???

Poetry Thursday

Did he Call Her?

Was she called to be with grandpa?
Did she finally hear?
Was he calling her to meet him?
Because it’s almost been a year

Did grandpa feel he’d missed the joy?
When he left way too soon
Is that why he called his girl
To join him beyond the moon

Such a precious angel,
Exactly like her mom
Was it that he missed them both?
That he needed her to come

Family left in complete shock
As their child is swept away
A void in their aching hearts
Too horrendous to convey


Their precious little angel
Began life so unsure
Their tiny bundle struggled
When appearing premature

Minor medical infliction
She improved with so much grace
This angel with the rose bud lips
And the perfect angel face

Dreams are lost of what might be
No words comfort the distraught
A family holding hearts in shards
For a child they have naught

God if you can hear me
Can you send a message soon?
Did Grandpa scoop her in his wing?
to fly beyond the moon?

Please assure the family
Waiting for your sign
Their treasure arrived safely
That she’s just simply divine 

Daunting Goodbye

Many tears sorrowfully cried
Taken before dawn, so unjustified
Parents mourn a loss so vile
Diminished hearts, diminished smile
Nature’s deplorable malicious joke
An Angel granted, with swift revoke
Daunting pain, unbearable to endure
For a cherished child, so innocent and pure
Universal question, we all ask why
Why we’re forced to face, such a rapid goodbye

Illustration Friday " Paradise

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Illustration Friday Paradise

in my case Pair of Dice

Paradise or Pair of Dice

Paradise can be a simple touch in an unexpected moment
A succulent cup of coffee to morning parched lips
A creative thought that taps your soul lightly waiting for you to embellish
It can be a cool bath on a humid unbearable day
Or your favorite cream filled chocolate during a midnight craving

Paradise can be anything you choose, a favorite song that jolts a darling memory
A walk in the wind that blows you around so hard it makes you giggle
Watching children as they play, sweet innocence still harboring their dreams
A random call from a friend that you’d just been thinking about
Sitting down to a meal with the whole family, knowing everyone is safe

Paradise for me is a great game of challenging scrabble, and fresh brewed coffee
A belly laugh that I instigate or one that I don’t, along with more banter
Fresh strawberries dipped in purdys chocolate and sweet red watermelon on a hot day
A bubble bath with great perfumes, candle light, and clean sheets
Meandering through inspirational stores, stopping for lunch and a gelato


Paradise is your choice, you construct what brings you joy, fills your soul
Everyone has their very own unique spirit to fulfill, to embrace and enhance
We all have that personal gift to share with the world, whether it’s wisdom
Compassion, communication, organization, creativity, comfort, humor, or generosity
Sometimes it can be a simple as a pair of dice that bring complete and utter contentment!

Sunday Scribblings "City or Country"

Picture August 2006

Sunday Scribbling prompt is city or country? City for me all the way, lights action, surrounded by ocean and mountains. Lots to see, do, discover. Even though I spent time living in the country, amenities were too spread out, felt like I was always driving. Everything is a trade off though; at times there was a deep sense of solace amongst all the work. Buying a big house that I had to work so hard to maintain seemed to be compensation for something else lacking in my life. At the time it was a great investment, the next place closer to the city was more enjoyable, but only a quick fix for a problem soon to resurface. Chasing bigger and better, thinking life will somehow rectify itself in a new house, or a new job, more money, more toys, in actuality it's just a false sense of security. In fact its more akin to what the grand Wizard of Oz told Dorothy, that what she was seeking was actually there all along!

Less is my More

Colossal country abode, deer and rabbits frolicked about
Queen of my castle, spiral oak staircase mocked success;
Cleaning and cleaning, forty four hundred square feet of cleaning
Floors to be mopped, windows galore, double staircases to vacuum
Budgeting, cutting, curbing, cooking, painting, working and driving
Slaving to pay taxes for a yard never used but to cut grass
Too much, too soon, too grand, too expensive in time, and effort, too bad

Move to a suburb, rancher half the size,exquisite fenced yard, hot tub, gazebo,
Dream kitchen, walk in pantry, neighborhood full of children
French doors, corian counters, mud room, sunken tub,
Parks, pools, stores, libraries, schools, safe walk everywhere,
Small jaunt to the city, ocean, lakes, and country less than thirty minutes away
Seemed perfect, flawless lawns, flawless homes, flawless people, instead
Flawed health, flawed focus, flawed love, flawed life, fooled for a moment

Disillusioned by the dream home, dream neighborhood, dream life, dream man
Then death, divorce, days of drudgery, demise, devastation, soon a rebirth
New home, comfortable, clean, contained, cozy, calm and pretty
New start, new life, new dreams, new ideas, new discoveries, new completeness
New friendships, new passions, new wisdom, new compassion, new capabilities
Born City girl having tried country, and city, finds solace, makes a home
Full of color, whimsy, art, music, lavish in love and peace somewhere in-between

Mother and Daughter reunion

I just couldn’t let my friend pick her daughter and son-in-law up at the airport all alone last night. I heeded my intuition and tagged along. Glad I did, it was desolate at the YVR, the plane was delayed, due to some problem at JFK. You’re welcome to read about the threat here!

Her kids landed at just after three, by the time they cleared security and we drove home it was probably five A.M. before we hit the pillow. I was already a little nervous venturing out on a Friday night during the impaired driving hours of early Saturday morning. When we hit a road block of firemen and police, I glanced over as we were flagged to a stop, a completely demolished motor bike surrounded by rescue workers lay abandoned. I have no doubt someone died last night. Sadly some mothers child. As we drove by, I turned away; the one previous glance was all I could take before my eyes started to well! On the return home that part of the highway was closed. I assume they were waiting to take measurements and particulars of the accident at sunlight. We managed to enjoy the dawn on our detour home.

Brenda was so excited to hug her daughter after a ten month absence. Jaclyn and Adam are living in Jersey and moving to South Carolina two days after they return to New York! There’s Jaclyn sporting her new tattoo of Canadian maple leaves, a proud brand that although she married an American proves she’s still a Canadian at heart!

I felt bad that I didn’t spend as much quality time with Brenda as I'd have liked. Between my waterbed, the wedding, and a few prior obligations I wasn’t as attentive as usual. Although we did share some nice chats, she is on her way home now and will return in two weeks to send the kids back to New York. I will be thrilled to see her again and much more prepared the next time!

One Grateful Chick!

I'd say this pretty much sums up how I feel these days!
Monday my friend Brenda arrived from Kelowna, tuesday we went to Steveston for the day, then to White Rock for dinner. It was so inspirational to wander the quaint little stores. I stumbled into the Thyme line of perfume, a rare find. The kids trekked to Vida in White Rock a few weeks ago to buy my perfume, only to find the store had closed up! We are devastated; it was such a great place to find reasonable unique gifts.

They didn't have my fragrance filigree which I like to mix with a touch of patchouli, instead I bought a small roll on called olive leaf. I think it's a mans cologne....but who cares I love the scent!

One of my birthday celebrations at the Chili Pepper House with all my friends. We giggled about everything from puppy dogs to....well.......to male anatomy!
My amazing group of goddess friends, are all very artistic woman! So who's not to say you attract what you are! Every woman at that table has triumphed over adversity bringing a unique flavor to the table!
Notice how my friend Chris found those lovely candles that emulate my art! Pretty thrilling if you ask me, maybe I could get a licensing contract one day! The cake was a lick your lips delicous angel food filled with strawberries....my favorite!
Brenda was attempting to take my picture as I was taking hers, it ensued in a few giggles! It's been a fun week, except for the waterbed leak. It was quickly drained and put back together, time consuming, but I was so grateful to only have been without my bed for one night!